I personally used Haproxy and Caddy.
I found caddy to be easy to use, has easy HTTPS, HTTP/3 is enabled by default, and can reload from the config easily.
It has sensible defaults, however, I felt Haproxy was a tad bit faster when using both of them locally. But the config for Haproxy took me a while, and I got no HTTP/3 and HTTPS was not easy. In production, HTTPS will be more work. It has a good admin panel and can be connected to Grafana as well. ( I didn’t even enable multi-threading!)
Nginx, I was reluctant to try it out, because the paid version is costly, and many from Ycombinator were against it. (I guess paid version has multi-threading or something?!?, I don’t know)
Perhaps I will write a blog post detailing my experience with each of them.
And as Jose Valim said, performance is not the only dimension we should be looking at.
